My Pathway to Peace

Sometimes God has other things in store.  Sometimes God takes a regular day or week and makes it more/different than you had in your plans.  Today is one of those days.

Here, instead of hearing from me, my dear husband Dave felt called to share his perspective on Gideon’s Birthday.  May you be blessed, as I was, to read it.

My Pathway to Peace

By: Dave Furlough

I’ve always loved days that aren’t “ordinary”.  Something, anything to change the mundane work/school day: dinner, baths, battles, working until that moment when the kids stop asking for something and are actually asleep.  Gideon’s birthday is and was far from ordinary.  The mix of emotions is really unlike any other day of the year.  Most mornings, when I wake up I think a lot about the specific day I’m in.  What could make it different?  What could make it special?  What has this date meant in history?  On that morning (March 31st), I really felt God sending more and more peace.  You know, that real rush of a feeling where nothing here on Earth seems to really matter, but His truths. Peace that I spent many years pining for but never really finding until God used Gideon.  So here we were, up bright and early on Gideon day.  There is so much I wanted to do, yet mostly just spend time with my family.  And our prayers were answered over and over in that way.

The day started watching the sunrise with Davey and Faith, definitely a precious time, a happy moment.  Then I drove my nephew to school, another fun happy time.  On my way home I was passing Chick-Fil-A.  Ever since moving to North Carolina, which marked for us the beginning of having kids, Chick-Fil-A has always been a place where me and Maria have spent lots of good focused time with the kids.  Immediately I thought to myself, “I want to take Gideon to Chick-Fil-A,” a bit of a sad moment.  But then I decided to drive through and get Chicken minis, the kids and adults were all excited to eat a yummy breakfast, which ended up being a joyous moment when I got home.  The day continued with the exciting moments of seeing your posts of your blue outfits (thank you these really made our day, seriously) a new Gideon tree being planted in the front yard (yes for me that’s really exciting), precious moments shopping at Lowe’s looking everywhere for blue flowers with the kids, listening to Davey and Faith share verses and Bible stories at Gideon’s grave site  and the evening hours with our families, cake, lots of laughs, a dance party, and an overall celebration.

And some sad moments too– I was drawn to my nephew Will during the time spent at Gideon’s grave site.  Will is a 1 year old kid, and he represents at times what Gideon would look like in size, stature, walking (staggering) around, and just being a 1-year old.  Will is really sweet, very easy to love and a great kid.  The irony was bittersweet watching that little man toddle around my son’s grave site.  But that is what this whole journey has been, bittersweet.

Here he is, big Will.
Here he is, big Will.  He just had his happy first birthday April 10th

During the course of the day I found myself reflecting a lot on what God has done for our family and others through Gideon’s life.  We are eternally grateful for being blessed with him and that he was ours.  I would not change a step of the path we walked and continue to journey on.  It truly is through trials that God produces perseverance and a faith stronger than ever.  I mentioned earlier about this underlying peace that surrounded us during Gideon’s birthday, and has surrounded us many days in between.  During the day I kept asking Maria, how are you doing?  Are you hanging in there?  She kept responding with a soft smile and a “Yeah, it’s a good day.”  About 4 years ago (right around the time I was leaving the 20s and entering the 30s), I was struggling with some severe anxiety.  Really something like I’ve never felt or been through before.  I tried medicine, I tried counseling, I tried breathing techniques, I tried diet changes, I tried lots of prayer, I tried running a lot, some which definitely helped here and there, but nothing like God’s peace he gave through Gideon’s life.  God’s timing was perfect.  I look at things a lot differently now, that rush of peace that God often gives, He gives much more often.  I don’t look at really anything in life as that stressful because it truly is just work, or it’s just a speech, or it’s just {fill in the blank}.  My fears were many.  But now, God reminds me through Gideon that if we have walked this path, many other paths we face more often in life just aren’t that rocky.  I live with a peace that I could only be living with now that I’m standing further down the path God pushed us down.  And again, I’m grateful for it.

Others have become a lot more important to me too.  What they need, what they are thinking, and it transforms my own level of stress and gives me a peace about my life.  I have always been one to be confident in where I am going because of my love for Christ.  God revealed again that we have nothing to fear, not even death; and therefore, living in peace, in all circumstances.  When Gideon was born and now in the days soon after remembering him on his birthday, I find it challenging sometimes to go to work, because while I know work is important for the obvious reasons, it seems so trivial compared to the taste of God’s glory that we have experienced or the life we have to look forward to in Heaven. Makes it tempting sometimes to focus on how much this world can drag us down.  I just want to spend time with my kids and my wife, friends and family, all the time.  But I know that God is in everything, so I must continue to fight daily for Him and His peace, because I know that’s where true joy comes from.

Finally, I have been able to truly cherish my time with my kids.  Even in the challenging moments, I look at each day as one I am thankful for.  On Gideon’s birthday, as they fought over who got to plant the first flower, I just smiled and thanked God that I was spending time with the blessings that He has so generously given to me.  When just yesterday my daughter was throwing her tennis racket, hitting balls at my face and letting me know I’m terrible at tennis, I just had to smile and be thankful.  We don’t know how many more of the moments we will get, we just really don’t know.  But, I truly believe God does have a peace for us that transcends all understanding.  One that we can live on earth with many things to fear, yet live in peace knowing that God is in control and nothing can separate us from Him.  For Gideon, for my Amazing God, for you, I am truly thankful for every step I have taken, especially on this extraordinary road.

Praying you too may find peace in all things.

Picture caption:  I have always hated the color blue.  Probably because the Yankees and Duke are blue, and I consider them evil empires.  And, us Marylanders are pretty obsessed with our flag and our colors (red and black).  Everything I used to buy, if it had a color choice, would be red and black.  But not now, now I choose cobalt blue for everything.  I even own a cobalt blue belt and cobalt blue shoes.  When we are given choice for a color of our kids sports uniforms, I bypass red and choose cobalt blue.  More proof God has a sense of humor.
Picture caption:  I have always hated the color blue.  Probably because the Yankees and Duke are blue, and I consider them evil empires.  And, us Marylanders are pretty obsessed with our flag and our colors (red and black).  Everything I used to buy, if it had a color choice, would be red and black.  But not now, now I choose cobalt blue for everything.  I even own a cobalt blue belt and cobalt blue shoes.  When we are given choice for a color of our kids sports uniforms, I bypass red and choose cobalt blue.  More proof God has a sense of humor.

3 thoughts on “My Pathway to Peace

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