These days are long. Are they not? I literally laid on my floor the other evening and just said “Heaven…oh its going to be soooooo awesome.” Over and over again. I think my family half laughed at me and half thought I was crazy. Its just, I couldn’t help thinking of all the pain, and sorrow, and physical discomfort, and fatigue, and dishes that are just all going to go away. What exactly it will be like, I have no idea, but I do know it will be bliss. And who doesn’t want bliss?
For me, its been a good thing. Honestly the idea of dying and heaven used to freak me out a bit and I preferred not thinking about it at all. But I don’t think God wants us to be scared or freaked out or worried about it. He wants us to know that “My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.” John 14:2-3. If it were not so, He would not have told us that it was.
The hope of Heaven is a big deal to me now. I may not be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel some days, but I still know that there is a light out there somewhere. When I reach it, it will all be okay. In these days, hard ones, uncomfortable and scary and busy ones…that gives me great hope.
I think of you and pray often that God continues to carry us along this journey together. Some Mondays come and I wonder if I have anything to tell you, anything to talk to you about. I wonder if I should even talk at all. Maybe I should just lay on my pillow and chant about heaven some more! But God always brings me back to these certain things:
1. God is always doing something, always teaching me something and its simply the question of whether or not I allow myself to keep record of it. To admit it. To write it down. I do that here, and I am so thankful for that. On the days I am tempted to hole up and hide, it motivates me to know writing to you keeps me accountable and I am eternally grateful for the lot of you who listen long enough for me to share.
2. I don’t want anyone to feel alone. It is one of my greatest prayers that you would not go this journey alone or think there is something wrong with you because of what you are experiencing or feeling. I saw it everyday with teen girls, all the time with young singles, every moment with young Moms…and I’m convinced the cycle never ends. Showing all the pretty and not so pretty sides of my life, my family and my crazy is my prayer of peace for you. You are more than good enough.
3. I need perspective. My mind gets real complainy sometimes and I have a tendency to let my mind focus on all in my life that is not as it should be. I’m sure I’m not alone in this. And so weekly (at least weekly) putting ink to paper helps prove to me that there is always a greater thing and a greater God at work. Always. Even on the days that I sleep through all my chores (um today).
Thank you for challenging me in these three areas, for walking with me and sharing with me. I love hearing from you. I love seeing you in the grocery store and having a quick cry in the bread aisle. Your hearts and your stories remind me of all the greater hope that the eyes cannot see. Its a hope that pulled me off the couch to write this post.
Is there anything that helps you on a weekly basis to keep hope?